The Civilian

Thecivilianmusic.com is a website that allows me, The Civilian, to express my thoughts, my loves, and my opinions.

My Opinions are formed around experiences I’ve had in my life. I’m the youngest of 4 children from a rural NC town. When I was 14 my brother died in a car accident in which he was drunk and driving. When I was 16 my mother was diagnosed with lung and brain cancer. When I was 17 my father had open heart surgery and was in the hospital with my mother. My mother died when I was 18. I think she grieved herself to death. These were the dark days. I battled depression, drugs, alcohol, suicidal thoughts, and a bad temper until I got married at 23. If these seem like a tragic badge of honor, they are. It was hard and it hurt like hell to make it out of these dark times halfway content and fulfilled.

The best day of my life was when I said “I do” to my wife. We have three children, two girls and a boy. Seeing your child born is a humbling experience. It is a miracle to watch. These are the good days. I feel very grateful for all that I have. And most of these good days are because of my wife. I am very much in love with her. She has a way of understanding me that I guess only soul mates can have. She takes me, and settles me. She challenges every strain of my existence to the very core of who I have become. She has no idea how beautiful she is and that makes her beauty even more eternal. I could not live without her, I need her more than I need air.

All these highs and lows I’ve experienced have allowed me to form an evolving opinion about life. It’s pretty simple; Don’t take yourself too seriously, and continue to learn. Never settle on the coming of death. Carpe Diem. Life is meant to be lived.

So gather with me in this electronical garden of thought and shed your rays of wisdom upon the screen…………………